The Curiosity Hook

Conversing is hard, sometimes. Sometimes you just run out of things to say. And when this happens while you’re trying to attract a beautiful woman, it usually means death. UNLESS, of course, you are prepared with a few useful tricks to keep ANY conversation exciting and interesting, and get HER to pursue it. Once you know the way to do it, it’s easy. Hook her.
Of TV producers and women
Question: How do you know a commercial is coming up?
Answer: Egg timers. I always keep a few near my set to help time my beer and bathroom runs.
Eh, not so much.
Still, I can almost always tell when a commercial is coming. So can you. You know, the music swells, the drama builds, something important is about… to… happen… Pringles?!! Damn, I’ll have to wait.
This is where the term ‘cliffhanger’ comes from. Producers didn’t take too long to figure out the key to keeping viewers watching over ads – ask a question that they want to see answered.
And you know what? It works. It works so well, that I bet you YOURSELF have watched shows you didn’t care about, looking back on you thought they were bad to atrocious, putrid, the worst kind of TV… but you wound up sitting through the whole thing because there was always a question you wanted the answer to.
And then once you got the ‘next,’ you stuck around for the next next.
It wouldn’t surprise me if you did it this week. Today.
Hell, you could be doing it right now.
ALL TV shows use this technique, because it works REALLY well.
And you know what? You should too.
The deadly silence
Obviously, it’s best to be a master conversationalist, able to turn any topic into witty gold and any situation into magic charm.
But even the BEST conversationalist is occasionally going to find himself without something to talk about. And anyone whose skills are short of the best will find their verbal well dry a LOT more often.
When you’re trying to pick up a woman, this is VERY dangerous. She’s making snap judgments, you’ve got to prove yourself quick and attract her, keep her interest, all while the world moves around her and other men come and go (especially in bars, clubs, and the like).
You can’t think of a THING, the silence is getting awkward, and suddenly she’s saying ‘Nice to meet you,’ shaking your hand (don’t you hate when a romantic possibility shakes your hand?) and walking out of your life.
What could you have done?
Hook her, baby. Cliffhang the lady.
Elevate your game
I LOVE this technique. Even if you’ve got all the social skill of untrained apes, master the hook and women will inexplicably find themselves interested in what you’re saying.
If you can carry yourself in a halfway-decent manner, a well-placed hook or two will GREATLY magnify her interest and, subsequently, attraction.
Alright, so what kind of hook am I talking about, anyway? It’s not like you’ll keep the girl staring at you wondering if you’re going to get shot or if you’ll find a way out of the cave, is it?
No, the hooks I’m talking about hint at INFORMATION, knowledge and a future conversation that she WANTS to have.
For example, one of my favorite hooks is ‘You know, I’ve noticed something very interesting about you. I bet no one else has ever noticed it.’
That’s it. That’s all I’ll say.
Turn the tables
Now of course she wants to know what I’ve seen, what this mysterious interesting thing could be. And I can tell her.
Or I can string it along, say something like ‘I don’t know if I should tell you. I don’t know you well enough, maybe you can’t handle it.’
Now she actively WANTS to get to know you better, just so she can PROVE she can handle it and hear this unseen tidbit spoken.
Think about what that kind of attitude does for you.
Yep. It makes EVERYTHING easier. You don’t need to win her over any more – she’s HOOKED, and now she’ll be trying to win YOU over.
Magic.
I call this the curiosity hook, and there are thousands more just like them.
Your mission, should you choose yada yada ya
So today, a little bit of homework. I want you to think of at least five curiosity hooks you can use to get a girl INTERESTED, but at the same time leave her wanting more.
Usually the topic will be her or her personality – basically EVERYONE is curious about how they appear to others – but beyond that, go wild. Tease. Be gentle. Be funny. Barely mention it. Harp on it. Fool around with this basic idea and come up with a bunch of ways to deliver it and get the girl interested.
Chances are good as you try them out, you’ll find certain ones work best with certain types of girls. So you’ll need your whole repertoire to be able to get that hook bit by all the different kinds of women in the world.
Hook… but also SATISFY
BUT, that’s not the end.
Sure, the cliffhanger might keep you watching, but it doesn’t help you like the show.
Not only do you need to hook her INTEREST, you need to eventually SAY something interesting and insightful. That’s what the lead-up is all about, and you don’t want her to be let down.
Luckily, this is a pretty easy thing. How can that be?
Well, humans are in general very similar, and there are a number of things you can say that will fit almost ANYONE. This is what fortune tellers do when they give a cold reading.
You go from there by paying attention to the reaction you get – and more deeply explore the things the girl finds interesting.
Like one of my favorites is ‘You put on a brave front, but actually a lot of the time you feel lonely. Your beauty creates a wall around you – some women are jealous, and most men act weird and only see your outer shell. Few people ever bother to look at the real you.’
Does that sound like you (aside from the beauty part)? Does it sound like something almost anyone could say about themselves?
Then, you pay attention to which part REALLY perks her. Does she start when you talk about women’s jealousy? You can bet she has gone through a period of ostracism by other women. The part about being treated like meat? She’s probably been harassed – either very badly or very recently (ALL beautiful women are harassed at some point, sadly, so if it was mild or long ago she probably wouldn’t react much – par for the course).
See how this works?
So, start thinking about various generic things you start with that will be true for most women – get inside their heads, think about common experiences, and go from there.
Don’t stop with just one scenario – you’ll always be able to find someone you can tell straight-off it won’t fit, and besides, many women will want to share your insight with friends.
You don’t want to get caught telling people the same thing.
Plus, you’ll want to repeat this exercise more than once on a girl.
Other than that, remember the most important part is the HOOK. Even more than the insight – because you’ve got to build the thing up first to REALLY make it magic.
And if you DO build it up, it WILL be magic.
If you want to learn more about how to use quality hooks and get get deep into the psyche of woman, you should check out my course: Seduction Science.

Enjoy...
Your Friend,
Derek Vitalio